The Atlantic Hurricane season runs from June 1 to November 30. In the last 15 years about 66 hurricanes in the Atlantic Basin affected Florida, with SEVEN hitting the state in 2004 and 2005. There hasn’t been a major one since Wilma in 2005 (a year in which every name set aside for hurricanes was used, plus they had to make up some new ones) and there has been some reporting lately saying….it’s time.
Which means our new condo in Florida is just property damage waiting to happen. NOW they tell me.
Just in case anything happens while I’m there, I asked my friend Bobbi for her hurricane preparedness plan.
STEP 1. Buy enough food and bottled water to last at least three days.
STEP 2. Put these supplies into the car.
STEP 3. Drive to Nebraska and remain there until Thanksgiving.
OK, so her plan isn’t the best. So I asked her Dad – who’s lived in Florida a tad longer:
Step 1: PURCHASE HOMEOWNERS’ INSURANCE: If you own a home you must have hurricane insurance. Fortunately, this insurance is cheap and easy to get, as long as your home meets two basic requirements:
(1) It is reasonably well-built, and…
(2) It is located in Nebraska.
Just kidding. Truthfully, while insurance companies are happy to insure your Florida home and collect the premiums, they are somewhat less anxious to actually pay out.
Step 2: PLAN AN EVACUATION ROUTE: If you live in a low-lying area, you should have an evacuation route planned. (To determine whether you live in a low-lying area, look at your driver’s license; if it says “Florida,” you live in a low-lying area.) The purpose of having an evacuation route is to avoid being trapped in your home when a major storm hits. Instead, you will be trapped in a gigantic traffic jam several miles from your home, along with two hundred thousand other evacuees. At least you won’t be lonely.
Step 3: KEEP INFORMED: As the hurricane draws near, it is vitally important that you keep abreast of the situation by turning on your television and watching TV reporters in rain slickers stand right next to the ocean telling you over and over how vitally important it is for everybody to stay away from the ocean.
Nine months after a hurricane, there is, apparently, an unusual upsurge in births. (duh!) For planning purposes, I hereby list the 2015 Hurricane Names: Ana, Bill, Claudette, Danny, Erika, Fred, Grace, Henri, Ida, Joaquin, Kate, Larry, Mindy, Nicholas, Odette, Peter, Rose, Sam, Teresa, Victor, Wanda